Okay, so I was flipping through youtube....and I typed in Ballet Magnificat....I clicked on the first video and I'm like, "oh wow, we just danced at this church not too long ago.....hey, that girl looks like me....oh wow....that is me....!"
It's not the best quality video, but you can see a little bit of our dance called "Freedom" by Jason Upton. I'm the girl that's in focus during the first shot, but after that you can't see where I'm at.
4/29/2008
4/27/2008
The Cross: Ultimate love or foolishness?
"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." 1 Corinthians 1:18
So many people.....so much to say.....so many are lost.....and I have the answer.....but most don't listen....their hearts are hard.
While I was in Chicago I met a man who I will never forget. His name was Michael.....he was playing the saxophone on the street corner.....I stopped to sing with him (it was an amazing thing to add the sound of my instrument to his, as both drifted into time and soon were lost in the faces, cars, buildings and waining light of the Chicago sky line.)
After a pleasant round of "My favorite things".....I asked him a question:
"Do you know Jesus?"
"Of course I do sweetheart." He replied without hesitation.
I didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed, I wanted to share Jesus with him. "Really? What is Jesus to you?"
"He's the universe....he's peace and all that is good. He was a good man who preached a good message and taught us how to redeem ourselves."
"That's not what the Bible says." I replied, "the Bible teaches that Jesus Christ died on a cross to pay for our sins, our wrong doings, because in and of ourselves we could never do enough good to cover for all the wrong we've done."
"Jesus Christ was a fool," he said, "if he died on that cross. No, that couldn't be it, he couldn't have done that, he wants us to redeem ourselves."
"How?"
"Through good works....if you kill a man, you must save one, if you steal, you must give back.....that's how you redeem yourself. Just look at the universe, buying and selling are the only ways to get anything. You can't get something for nothing. You must not believe in Jesus," he retorted, starting to get angry, "you believe in the Bible....you have your noes stuck in a book....you believe a lie....you've been decieved....you have no idea what you are talking about.....that's a nice fairy tale sweetheart, but it's not reality."
I melted on the inside. My heart broke. How could I explain my Jesus to this man? How do I explain the incredible love of Christ? All I could do was smile sweetly and all the sudden I heard myself ask him, "what is reality?"
"This is reality. You, me, Chicago, right now."
"Can you prove that?"
"No."
"Exactly, this is reality to you because it's what you've experienced. How can you tell me that what I've experienced is not reality, when you've never experienced it? You won't understand the reality of Jesus' love....a love that would drive him to do something foolish...like die on a cross for you and me...unless you see it in your own life. It takes a step of faith."
"Whatever....you're crazy.....that's not true...you probably read it in the Bible somewhere....peace girl, I'm done."
"Okay, thanks for talking to me, have a great evening."
The devil worshiper at Barnes and Noble.....Morris at work every morning....Johnny at the bus station.....and now Michael....all have one thing in common. They know of Jesus, but they don't believe in him. They believe in love, but they don't believe in redemption. They believe in the historical Jesus, but they don't believe in the Word. They believe that they have Jesus, but he MAKES NO DIFFERENCE IN THEIR LIVES.
No fairy tale ending....no amazing conversion....like many of the other people I've talked to about Jesus, he'll accept Jesus as a good man, but not as savior....the Bible is a good book....but not something to be taken too seriously.
These basic concepts are things that my life is built on. They are the core of who I am, and they are the motivation behind much of what I do. How do I convey who Jesus is and how he can change them? Street evangelism is a hard thing. I don't like it...but I also can't stand walking past someone who is headed to Hell....as if everything is okay.
I guess it's not really my job to get frustrated....this is the Lord's work...he will see it completed...all I can do is offer myself as an instrument.
So many people.....so much to say.....so many are lost.....and I have the answer.....but most don't listen....their hearts are hard.
While I was in Chicago I met a man who I will never forget. His name was Michael.....he was playing the saxophone on the street corner.....I stopped to sing with him (it was an amazing thing to add the sound of my instrument to his, as both drifted into time and soon were lost in the faces, cars, buildings and waining light of the Chicago sky line.)
After a pleasant round of "My favorite things".....I asked him a question:
"Do you know Jesus?"
"Of course I do sweetheart." He replied without hesitation.
I didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed, I wanted to share Jesus with him. "Really? What is Jesus to you?"
"He's the universe....he's peace and all that is good. He was a good man who preached a good message and taught us how to redeem ourselves."
"That's not what the Bible says." I replied, "the Bible teaches that Jesus Christ died on a cross to pay for our sins, our wrong doings, because in and of ourselves we could never do enough good to cover for all the wrong we've done."
"Jesus Christ was a fool," he said, "if he died on that cross. No, that couldn't be it, he couldn't have done that, he wants us to redeem ourselves."
"How?"
"Through good works....if you kill a man, you must save one, if you steal, you must give back.....that's how you redeem yourself. Just look at the universe, buying and selling are the only ways to get anything. You can't get something for nothing. You must not believe in Jesus," he retorted, starting to get angry, "you believe in the Bible....you have your noes stuck in a book....you believe a lie....you've been decieved....you have no idea what you are talking about.....that's a nice fairy tale sweetheart, but it's not reality."
I melted on the inside. My heart broke. How could I explain my Jesus to this man? How do I explain the incredible love of Christ? All I could do was smile sweetly and all the sudden I heard myself ask him, "what is reality?"
"This is reality. You, me, Chicago, right now."
"Can you prove that?"
"No."
"Exactly, this is reality to you because it's what you've experienced. How can you tell me that what I've experienced is not reality, when you've never experienced it? You won't understand the reality of Jesus' love....a love that would drive him to do something foolish...like die on a cross for you and me...unless you see it in your own life. It takes a step of faith."
"Whatever....you're crazy.....that's not true...you probably read it in the Bible somewhere....peace girl, I'm done."
"Okay, thanks for talking to me, have a great evening."
The devil worshiper at Barnes and Noble.....Morris at work every morning....Johnny at the bus station.....and now Michael....all have one thing in common. They know of Jesus, but they don't believe in him. They believe in love, but they don't believe in redemption. They believe in the historical Jesus, but they don't believe in the Word. They believe that they have Jesus, but he MAKES NO DIFFERENCE IN THEIR LIVES.
No fairy tale ending....no amazing conversion....like many of the other people I've talked to about Jesus, he'll accept Jesus as a good man, but not as savior....the Bible is a good book....but not something to be taken too seriously.
These basic concepts are things that my life is built on. They are the core of who I am, and they are the motivation behind much of what I do. How do I convey who Jesus is and how he can change them? Street evangelism is a hard thing. I don't like it...but I also can't stand walking past someone who is headed to Hell....as if everything is okay.
I guess it's not really my job to get frustrated....this is the Lord's work...he will see it completed...all I can do is offer myself as an instrument.
4/24/2008
Freedom
Do you see the battle? Can you hear the noise?
The blood of martyrs cries out to deaf ears,
The countryside turned into patchwork with the bodies of saints.
Cries of anguish tempered only by a whisper of hope,
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Are you still in bondage? Can you see the light?
Prison doors are unlocked, broken chains fall all around.
The ones who lurked in the shadows have come into the light,
All that they owe has been wiped clean.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Do you see the sin? Can you smell the poison?
The harlot has devoured many, her words are empty and vile.
Her victims left disillusioned, a bitter taste in their mouths,
Their disgrace has become the word of their testimony.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Are you weary of your burden? Can you taste defeat?
The fatherless are desolate, no one can take them in.
Broken and lifeless they fall without a sound,
With determination in their eyes they stand once more.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Do you know the one who saves? Can you feel his love?
The King of kings and Lord of lords is coming.
He will make all things new, in his presence there is peace.
Our hope is in that day, hold on 'til then, with
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
The blood of martyrs cries out to deaf ears,
The countryside turned into patchwork with the bodies of saints.
Cries of anguish tempered only by a whisper of hope,
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Are you still in bondage? Can you see the light?
Prison doors are unlocked, broken chains fall all around.
The ones who lurked in the shadows have come into the light,
All that they owe has been wiped clean.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Do you see the sin? Can you smell the poison?
The harlot has devoured many, her words are empty and vile.
Her victims left disillusioned, a bitter taste in their mouths,
Their disgrace has become the word of their testimony.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Are you weary of your burden? Can you taste defeat?
The fatherless are desolate, no one can take them in.
Broken and lifeless they fall without a sound,
With determination in their eyes they stand once more.
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
Do you know the one who saves? Can you feel his love?
The King of kings and Lord of lords is coming.
He will make all things new, in his presence there is peace.
Our hope is in that day, hold on 'til then, with
Voices raised in one accord crying,
FREEDOM
4/23/2008
Chi-town!!
I had a wonderful weekend. I was in Chicago with Jeremy and Kelley......and Anna Z. came for a few days too. Ballet Magnificat was at Moody this weekend as well. We got to see the Hiding Place (Deidre....my roommate....was in the show). I also got to go to church with Jeremy (which I loved!) and I went to classes....and chapel.....and met his friends.....it was pretty sweet. We even went out on our first dinner date! It was a lot of fun to get dressed up and go out.....but we both felt a little goofy....oh well.
I throughly enjoyed it!
Here's a few pictures.
I throughly enjoyed it!
Here's a few pictures.
4/18/2008
I heart trainee life!
Trainee Party!! We had SO much fun....we all dressed up and watched "Enchanted"
Praise Him!
4/17/2008
A few thoughts
Hey all.
The Lord has given me a choice this week. I feel lifeless and dead. However, his name is still to be praised. This passage from C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters is what I've been living. I didn't even realize it until last night. I was so focused on trying to get myself back to "feeling normal" that I completely over looked the fact that I am trying to live Christianity in my own strength.
Read this:
Whenever they [the humans] are attending to the Enemy Himself [God] we are defeated, but there are ways of preventing them from doing so. The simplest is to turn their gaze away from Him towards themselves. Keep them watching their own minds are trying to produce feelings there by the action of their own wills. When they meant to ask Him for charity, let them, instead, start trying to manufacture charitable feelings for themselves and not notice that this is what they are doing. When they meant to pray for courage, let them really be trying to feel brave. When they say they are praying for forgiveness, let them be trying to feel forgiven. Teach them to estimate the value of each prayer by their success in producing the desired feeling; and never let them suspect how much success or failure of that kind depends on whether they are well or ill, fresh or tired, at the moment.
Isn't that an incredible thought? How often do we chase a "feeling" or a "way of life" instead of running hard after the Lord? How we feel about things, our perspective on life may change from day to day, but he is constant. What am I chasing? What do I have my eyes set on?
Well....I probably won't write again for a while.....I'm heading off to Chicago tomorrow to see one of my two favorite guys! (The other is in his forties and lives in Michigan ;-)
Love you all.
-Julie
The Lord has given me a choice this week. I feel lifeless and dead. However, his name is still to be praised. This passage from C.S. Lewis' The Screwtape Letters is what I've been living. I didn't even realize it until last night. I was so focused on trying to get myself back to "feeling normal" that I completely over looked the fact that I am trying to live Christianity in my own strength.
Read this:
Whenever they [the humans] are attending to the Enemy Himself [God] we are defeated, but there are ways of preventing them from doing so. The simplest is to turn their gaze away from Him towards themselves. Keep them watching their own minds are trying to produce feelings there by the action of their own wills. When they meant to ask Him for charity, let them, instead, start trying to manufacture charitable feelings for themselves and not notice that this is what they are doing. When they meant to pray for courage, let them really be trying to feel brave. When they say they are praying for forgiveness, let them be trying to feel forgiven. Teach them to estimate the value of each prayer by their success in producing the desired feeling; and never let them suspect how much success or failure of that kind depends on whether they are well or ill, fresh or tired, at the moment.
Isn't that an incredible thought? How often do we chase a "feeling" or a "way of life" instead of running hard after the Lord? How we feel about things, our perspective on life may change from day to day, but he is constant. What am I chasing? What do I have my eyes set on?
Well....I probably won't write again for a while.....I'm heading off to Chicago tomorrow to see one of my two favorite guys! (The other is in his forties and lives in Michigan ;-)
Love you all.
-Julie
4/16/2008
Revival
I need a revival.
Revive my heart, dear Jesus. Fill me with your Spirit once again. I know you live in me.....teach me to live like I know that. I don't want to just drift downstream. I want to swim against the current, press on toward the prize. Jesus, shine through me. Use me. Consume me. I need more of you Jesus.....I'm empty, I want you to fill me. Nothing in the world can satisfy me....only you.
Even these words are empty Jesus. I have nothing to say to you to convey my thoughts. My prayers are so shallow.
Even as I write I realize how self focused this is. Oh Jesus, revive me.
Revive my heart, dear Jesus. Fill me with your Spirit once again. I know you live in me.....teach me to live like I know that. I don't want to just drift downstream. I want to swim against the current, press on toward the prize. Jesus, shine through me. Use me. Consume me. I need more of you Jesus.....I'm empty, I want you to fill me. Nothing in the world can satisfy me....only you.
Even these words are empty Jesus. I have nothing to say to you to convey my thoughts. My prayers are so shallow.
Even as I write I realize how self focused this is. Oh Jesus, revive me.
4/11/2008
Just for fun
Hey guys!
I thought you might get a chuckle out of this.....I'm sure you've all heard/seen Twila Paris. Well, Ballet Magnificat apparently did a music video with her WAY back in the day. It's hilarious. I laughed so hard I almost died. It's SO different from what we do now.....but it's kind of cool.
The only thing I can't figure out....why is there a tree in the dining room??
The 3rd dancer is Ms. Cassandra (Trainee director), the last girl is Ms. Kathy (the founder/artistic director), the first guy is Mr. Yuri (Omega company director), and the last guy is Mr. John (company dancer).
Don't watch the whole thing (it's boring) but the first couple of minutes are really funny.
So...after that little piece of history.....here's a really cool video of Omega doing "Hiding Place"
I thought you might get a chuckle out of this.....I'm sure you've all heard/seen Twila Paris. Well, Ballet Magnificat apparently did a music video with her WAY back in the day. It's hilarious. I laughed so hard I almost died. It's SO different from what we do now.....but it's kind of cool.
The only thing I can't figure out....why is there a tree in the dining room??
The 3rd dancer is Ms. Cassandra (Trainee director), the last girl is Ms. Kathy (the founder/artistic director), the first guy is Mr. Yuri (Omega company director), and the last guy is Mr. John (company dancer).
Don't watch the whole thing (it's boring) but the first couple of minutes are really funny.
So...after that little piece of history.....here's a really cool video of Omega doing "Hiding Place"
4/10/2008
Humbled
I am humbled by how the Lord works.
Today was a long day. We had ballet off, so I worked a long shift at work. While I was there, a girl that rarely works with me walked in the door.....my heart sunk. The last time we worked together, I got frustrated with her and subsequently spouted off to the cooks.....was I justified? Probably. Was I right in God's eyes? Nope. So, as soon as she walked in, I knew I had to apologize. I had made our issue public (by talking to our cooks about it) and so I had to make the apology public too (something my mom taught me.)
Apologizing publicly, especially when I think I'm right, is not an easy thing. Anyway, I talked to her about it, and made it clear that I was out of line. It was a tough pill to swallow, but I don't want anything to mar my witness for Christ.
After that it was like a switch had been flipped....we talked the whole day.....a wall that had been put up suddenly toppled over. This girl, who I used to tolerate at best, has started to open up to me. Praise the Lord. How am I supposed to share Jesus if I act like a self righteous hypocrite? Thankfully, God gives second chances, and I am now in the position to really get to know this girl, and share Jesus with her.
I'm not saying this so you guys can give me a pat on the back. I just want it to be a testimony as to how God's ways are always better. The world wants to see a difference in our actions.....if we respond in a godly manner, especially when we mess up, they can tell.
Today was a long day. We had ballet off, so I worked a long shift at work. While I was there, a girl that rarely works with me walked in the door.....my heart sunk. The last time we worked together, I got frustrated with her and subsequently spouted off to the cooks.....was I justified? Probably. Was I right in God's eyes? Nope. So, as soon as she walked in, I knew I had to apologize. I had made our issue public (by talking to our cooks about it) and so I had to make the apology public too (something my mom taught me.)
Apologizing publicly, especially when I think I'm right, is not an easy thing. Anyway, I talked to her about it, and made it clear that I was out of line. It was a tough pill to swallow, but I don't want anything to mar my witness for Christ.
After that it was like a switch had been flipped....we talked the whole day.....a wall that had been put up suddenly toppled over. This girl, who I used to tolerate at best, has started to open up to me. Praise the Lord. How am I supposed to share Jesus if I act like a self righteous hypocrite? Thankfully, God gives second chances, and I am now in the position to really get to know this girl, and share Jesus with her.
I'm not saying this so you guys can give me a pat on the back. I just want it to be a testimony as to how God's ways are always better. The world wants to see a difference in our actions.....if we respond in a godly manner, especially when we mess up, they can tell.
4/07/2008
Prayer
Prayer is an amazing thing. The Lord's been teaching me a lot about it lately. We're studying it in Ballet Mag. bible study....and I've been studying it on my own for a while now too.
"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have what we asked of him." 1 John 5:14-15
How true that is. When we pray according to the Lord's will....nothing can stop it from happening. I've seen it time and time and time again.
I love to pray, the Lord's been teaching me SO much about it....I see SO many results from it...yet, honestly, I still fail to give it the time and attention it should have in my life. I know that when we pray, things happen. I know that God hears me....I know that he speaks to my heart and gives me specific things/people to pray for....so why do I consistently put it at the end of my list?
What....are my friends, my roommates, my family...more important then the Creator of heaven and earth? How many times have I spent an afternoon pouring out my frustrations and problems and pains to those that have NO control? Why do I do that? I should be going to my Father, who knows what to do, and how to fix every problem I encounter. I should have a humble, sweet, patient spirit....but instead I'm trapped in this stupid overly dramatic, girly, emotional ridiculousness. It's frustrating. Most of you would love to tell me that I'm "doing great" but don't. I know where I fall short, and it's time for me to stop making excuses for myself.
"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love." John 15:8-10
Okay. That makes it simple. I need to abide in Him. I'm getting better at it...but I have a LONG way to go. Thankfully, the Lord is patient, and he never gets tired of teaching me. What a good God we serve! He is awesome. He is slow to anger and abounding in amazing, wonderful, incomprehensibly steadfast love.
"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have what we asked of him." 1 John 5:14-15
How true that is. When we pray according to the Lord's will....nothing can stop it from happening. I've seen it time and time and time again.
I love to pray, the Lord's been teaching me SO much about it....I see SO many results from it...yet, honestly, I still fail to give it the time and attention it should have in my life. I know that when we pray, things happen. I know that God hears me....I know that he speaks to my heart and gives me specific things/people to pray for....so why do I consistently put it at the end of my list?
What....are my friends, my roommates, my family...more important then the Creator of heaven and earth? How many times have I spent an afternoon pouring out my frustrations and problems and pains to those that have NO control? Why do I do that? I should be going to my Father, who knows what to do, and how to fix every problem I encounter. I should have a humble, sweet, patient spirit....but instead I'm trapped in this stupid overly dramatic, girly, emotional ridiculousness. It's frustrating. Most of you would love to tell me that I'm "doing great" but don't. I know where I fall short, and it's time for me to stop making excuses for myself.
"If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit, and so prove to be My disciples. Just as the Father has loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His love." John 15:8-10
Okay. That makes it simple. I need to abide in Him. I'm getting better at it...but I have a LONG way to go. Thankfully, the Lord is patient, and he never gets tired of teaching me. What a good God we serve! He is awesome. He is slow to anger and abounding in amazing, wonderful, incomprehensibly steadfast love.
4/05/2008
Tornado
Yesterday we had a HUGE storm here in Jackson. The storm came at about noon, and lasted until about 1:30. I was at Ballet Mag. studios at the time. The power went out, the sky turned green, and we all sat in the hallway waiting for it to blow over. I've never been afraid of storms (actually, they fascinate me) so I watched a little bit of it from the windows of the studio (until some well meaning friends made me go somewhere a little safer). It was awesome......The winds swirled at a fantastic speed, the leaves were caught up as in some crazed dance, and the trees even joined in, swaying in an uncomfortable circular motion.......Okay, so that's a bit dramatized....but it was cool. The tornado came right past the studio.....but thanks to the Lord, no one was hurt, none of the cars were damaged, nothing on the building was shaken. However, half a mile away...."Some 80-100 vehicle windows were blown out at Watson Quality Ford on I-55 frontage road just south of County Line Road in Jackson on Friday."(Clarion Ledger-local paper). God is good, amen??
I really do love storms. First, I love the huge noises, chaotic sights, and fresh smells brought in by a storm. It reminds me so much of the Lord. We think that we have pretty amazing technology....we can "raise" the dead......we can "create" new life....we can "heal" the sick....we can "do" so much by our "own" power.....but no one can claim to do anything to the weather! Only Jesus Christ, the Son of the Living God, can do anything to a storm. We are rendered powerless in a storm, while all he has to do is speak one word, and all is calm. What a good reminder of how little power we have over anything.
Here are some pictures of the damage:
Some 92,000 were out of power (including me!). Restaurants, grocery stores, gas stations, movie theaters....and everything else came to a grinding halt without electricity. It was a little frustrating.....I like my conveniences like everyone else . But at the same time, I love to see God's power displayed in such a tangible way. All this chaos, and he still holds it in the palm of his hands.
I really do love storms. First, I love the huge noises, chaotic sights, and fresh smells brought in by a storm. It reminds me so much of the Lord. We think that we have pretty amazing technology....we can "raise" the dead......we can "create" new life....we can "heal" the sick....we can "do" so much by our "own" power.....but no one can claim to do anything to the weather! Only Jesus Christ, the Son of the Living God, can do anything to a storm. We are rendered powerless in a storm, while all he has to do is speak one word, and all is calm. What a good reminder of how little power we have over anything.
Here are some pictures of the damage:
Some 92,000 were out of power (including me!). Restaurants, grocery stores, gas stations, movie theaters....and everything else came to a grinding halt without electricity. It was a little frustrating.....I like my conveniences like everyone else . But at the same time, I love to see God's power displayed in such a tangible way. All this chaos, and he still holds it in the palm of his hands.
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